不好受

this year..
i cried..bcoz of frenship..
i cried..bcoz of missing someone..
i cried..bcoz of my family..
y izit everytime bcoz of my bro makin stupid mistake..
and scold all of us together?!
y parents always saw wat their son has done..
and not wat their daughter has done?..
y izit so unfair?
son is still so important huh?..
if not satisfy wid me..
y born me to this earth?..
it's no fun carrying "fear" to go home everyday..
scared if i never do properly what they ordered..
scared if i never obey them..they will angry..
wat i did without bein ordered by them..
were never bein appreciated..
they only noe how to order to do tis n tat..
did anyone think at my side before???
my bro can sleep straight away after came home from skool..
and no nid to help to do anth..
while i muz help after came home from skool??..
cant u see that im actually very tired??..
sometimes..
my bro yelled at my mom..
but she still hear it as if like..
boy's talkin is tat hard one!..
horse's!!
tis is the difference between son and daughter izit?..
y other ppl's parents can still finish their hse work perfectly..
even tho they got work to do..
while my parents cant?..
i already tried my best to do my part..
i even helped when they didnt do their part..
y r u still complainin about me?..
my mom doesnt believe tat i really haf a lot of assignments to do..
until she heard from my aunt..
tat her daughter too haf alot of assignments to do.. ==t
they willl never understand how i feel..
and they don care..
bcoz..
im not "son"..
dam it!!!
儿子又怎样..
大完咩？！
妈的！！！
弟弟不尊敬我..
那都是他们一手造成的..
我有多心痛？
他们都不会懂..
我到低是不是多余的那一个??
我不会让他们操心..
我只想要他们关心..
很难吗？

我没想象中那么坚强...
索性死掉算了..
反正少一个不少..
真无奈... T_T